The stay at home orders are continuing to send us through the circles of hell. When will they end? Do we really need them right now? Can’t we at least try to get back to some kind of normal? There is not even a target date here in Oregon and our curve is flat. We hear nothing from our Governor. So further into the circles we go. We passed through level three where we were tortured with The New England Patriot’s Super Bowl wins. However, desperate to get out of level three which is Gluttony, we had to take a dive through the secondary part of level three which was the Philadelphia hot dog eating contest. Have you ever watched the hot dog eating contest, buns and all? Grown men stuffing hot dogs in their mouths, for what? The glory? There is no vomiting allowed. But in hell, you see a lot of it. And we thought the Super Bowl wins was bad…
Being stuck at home for a month already and looking at another one, sent us tumbling down further into the circles. We found ourselves on circle # four which is Greed. Sure enough, we were in Filene’s Basement in Boston on Bridal Gown day. Thousands of would be brides stormed the basement as it opened. We were tromped and trampled. Women whose weddings were coming up and should have been happy were snarling at each other. One would be bride snatched a dress from another bride and shoved and weaved her way through the screaming masses with the dress. We crawled out of Filene’s only to be caught in the Black Friday crowds at Target and if we thought the brides were bad, you should have seen this crowd. Would we come out alive or would we be suffocated underneath huge bodies running over us. We could see ahead the crowds surrounding the toilet paper, screaming and fighting for the two ply. Did we even have to go through the toilet paper wars in hell? We realized that was part of why we were in hell after all. Surely circle 5 could not be this bad? We knew circle 5 was Anger and we were there. We were angry, so we slipped down further and now we’re on circle #5.
We are surrounded by anger on circle #5. Once friendly neighbors had all become tattletales. It was a cacophony of tattlers, all screaming at each other. Some Governors have set up tattletale hot lines. “I saw her go under the yellow tape to walk with her small children in the closed park.” “I saw a car parked by the trail which means they drove to hike and they’re not supposed to. Let me give you their license plate number.” “Arrest that man, he is not wearing a mask.” ” I am a good judge of distance and I walked by a group of people standing only 5 feet apart and not only that, they were drinking. Most insulting of all, they were laughing. Don’t they know this is serious? We are supposed to all be miserable together. The address is 310 Happy Go Lucky Street of all things. I hope you can come quickly so I can get my pleasure out of seeing them arrested.” The only glimmer of hope from this group of tattlers was that one of them tattled on Tom Brady who was seen working out in a closed park in his new home town of Tampa.
Mayor @JaneCastor on a @TomBrady sighting in Tampa:
“Our parks are closed down so a lot of our park staff patrol around…and saw an individual working out in one of our downtown parks. She went over to tell him it was closed. And it was Tom Brady.” https://bit.ly/2xn0bQ9
Surely the next level will not be Heresy, but Revolt. That is a level I am looking forward to. I think. This is hell after all.
Are you still Trapped?